Feels thread?

[Leetgrain]

Tired of the PM's I see 

Y'know what, I want to just vent about how being a TS sucks and how it's made me depressed...

But I'm just too tired, I can't take hating not being who I want to be anymore, I'm just tired of waking up and thinking that I've let myself down, I'm tired of having to wait...

Being transsexual is awkward and fun at first I have to admit, realizing what you really are, how you can be really happy, but then it goes downhill fast, The depression of not being that beautiful woman you want to be, the what ifs, the doubt - Am I really a transsexual? Am I just a big fucking pretender? A Liar?

...Will I be able to do it...?

The hope is always there... that one, big fucking hope that I can push through, the hope that I can work up the guts to tell friends and family, the hope that I will be who I want to be. but it is just so hard sometimes, I feel bad nearly every day, I've cried a lot and I just feel so weak...

I just don't know... I walked through so strong and I crumbled at the first steps, I just wish this was so much simpler, I wish I was just born a woman, just... a gorgeous, happy woman, I want to be able to be who I want to be.

I just can't cope sometimes, it's too much to deal with on a daily basis.

[Christovski]

My feels are significantly less profound than leet here so I dunno if I should bother posting after that, meh why not HERE COMES A RANT

Personally because I am brutally honest and say what I mean and don't bullshit around with white lies I have polarized most people I know into groups of the people who hate me since I speak my mind and they disagree with me or think I'm a jerk because I'm honest and don't lie to people when they ask me stuff; and the group of people who tolerate or even like me because I am so straightforward and they know exactly where they stand if they ask me anything. 

So life is a bit bipolar for me since there are people who hate my guts and people who are close friends its a friggin rollercoaster this life.

I also have issues dealing with people I guess cause people generally don't understand me and I don't understand them because my feels work differently than theirs maybe my whole brain works differently.  Communication sucks cause people always misunderstand me or I misunderstand them because I believe actions speak louder than words, that what a person does says more about them than something they said, because talk is so often bullshit in this modern times, but doing something is much harder to fake. 

Also people are dicks to each other so much in this time/modern day/whateverthefuck it is kind of ridiculous, racism sexism trolling bullying is just crazy right now and its the kind of thing that stresses me out cause it just makes things worse.  Like as a male white american I always feel bad for stuff other male white americans do that brings a bad reputation, so much racism and hate and bullying and our country has such a reputation for being warmongering douchebags its ridiculous.  I'm not saying boohoo i'm male white american (which would be a douchebag thing to say), I'm just saying i wish other people who are similar to me weren't such shitty people to everyone else, so I wouldn't feel bad for all the things my peers are doing to make us look like all shitheads even me!  I just feel like people prejudge me cause of people like me who have shit on them, like when you get europeans on the server and they start raging at us for being americans like we are all dickheads to other countries even though its only some people.

Now I'm no hippy pussy who sits and whines that everyone should be nice to everyone else (I hate hippies!), I definitely rage at people who hurt my friends (in general not just physically but verbal attacks bullying trolling etc) because I feel like its an attack on my friends (or me whoever it is at the time) and they deserve retaliation, I think that if someone has done something that deserves retaliation they should get it.  But seriously if people were less dicks to each other I think people would have overall better mental health.

Obviously I was bullied a lot as a kid and so now I'm kind of neurotic and fucked in the head with tons and tons of Incredible-Hulk type repressed anger, and I'm sure I have enemies even here in CG because thats just how life is there are dicks dicks everywhere people always start shit in this world and I wish there was less of it because it just leads to retaliations and things spiralling into a shitstorm.  Like me raging at Kwaurtz for trolling Tictac was kind of shitty for me to do but I was just retaliating for him shitting on my friend and I should have just been the bigger man and been chill about it.  Maybe we all should try to be the bigger man and help people out and be chill instead of raging, maybe then we could be better people, I do feel bad for talking shit but in the heat of the moment it feels so damn good.  Maybe that is why people won't stop being dicks.

/old man rant

[Christovski]

-waits for everyone to rage about this post-

-still feels bad for posting after leet who posted way more legitimate stuff-

[Cadaver]

Why post "feels" when you should be "feeling" in Real Life?

Get out of the basement more...


Just saying.

[Coreybush11]

Get out of the basement more...

JOKES ON YOU
WE DONT HAVE A BASEMENT

[Tictactoe360]

Get out of the basement more...

JOKES ON YOU
WE DONT HAVE A BASEMENT

JOKES ON ALL OF YOU MY BEDROOM IS THE SECOND BASEMENT BEDROOM, I'M RIGHT BESIDE THE HEATING SYSTEM COME AT ME WINTER

[Boxman]

Doesn't matter, the only feel I have is not having sex. I'm sorry all of you are having shitty times in life.

[Coreybush11]

[Coreybush11]

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usZ6SSzGE7Y" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=usZ6SSzGE7Y</a>

[Leomire]

Ok sooooo HERE WE FUCKING GO

I'm stuck in highschool and I've lost every best friend I've ever had. I lost my first best friend (and only friend at the time) when I went from elementary school to middle school because he was a grade behind. I still see him occasionally but it isn't the same.

People hated me in middle school and those who didn't I hated them because I thought they were weird. So I went through it alone.

My next best friend was a girl I met the first day of high school. We texted daily and such. Eventually after so much stress and abuse (from her to me) we somehow got into a relationship. It's a really long story that I don't care to get into right now...but the things she did to me... it was possibly the most abusive relationship I've ever known a person to have.

This drove me to become a emo-like hipster poet/guitarist/song writer. I pretty much hate everyone in my school save 5 or so people because they are all uncaring, barely sentient beings who lack any sort of capacity for critical thinking or even basic math. Everyone is a stoner except me and it annoys me cause I don't like smoking (I have asthma so I stay away from it).

Finally I just recently lost my final, most supportive best friend I've known. She was a very innocent, very smart girl and she was different in the fact that she wasn't a FUCKING WHORE like the rest of my school. She was somebody who was actually raised well and could hold a great conversation. I don't have feelings for her, and nor does she for me; it was like a brother/sister type thing. But basically we were playing truth or dare via text Sunday and she told me to make my last question before she went to sleep a good one. So, I went for a shock value kinda thing and asked her if she ever masturbated or did anything dirty. NOTE: We had been talking about sex and such up to that point already so I mean it's not like it was out of the blue! But anyway she did not answer and there was an awkward silence when she should have texted back (the kind that speaks for itself) I than shot off 4-5 more texts apologizing profusely and how stupid, awkward, and idiotic I was. She has not talked to me since.

I have a few "school friends" but I barely have any real friends; she was the last and I am alone. IT'S NOT EVEN LIKE I'M A SOCIALLY AWKWARD PERSON OR ANYTHING! EVERYONE SAYS I'M FUCKING HILARIOUS IN SCHOOL AND PEOPLE LIKE ME! But just whenever people get to know me and realize I'm not all jokes and such they leave.

Everyone leaves once they get to know me.

So here I am again, depressed, lonely, and suicidal. Just another fucking day. I miss my best friend especially; she was just nice and caring to a level I had not experienced from any other human being outside my family before. I am tearing up as I write this. I wish she could she this and yet I don't; it's a strange feeling.

The poem I'm writing now? The first few lines are as follows,

"There's no such thing as friends
Just me, myself, and the words that I've penned
And when all is said and done, don't we all just die in the end?"

I don't have friends in high school either. I know that feel bro. It sucks but I get by because in the end everyone ends up alone.

[Leetgrain]

Ok sooooo HERE WE FUCKING GO

I'm stuck in highschool and I've lost every best friend I've ever had. I lost my first best friend (and only friend at the time) when I went from elementary school to middle school because he was a grade behind. I still see him occasionally but it isn't the same.

People hated me in middle school and those who didn't I hated them because I thought they were weird. So I went through it alone.

My next best friend was a girl I met the first day of high school. We texted daily and such. Eventually after so much stress and abuse (from her to me) we somehow got into a relationship. It's a really long story that I don't care to get into right now...but the things she did to me... it was possibly the most abusive relationship I've ever known a person to have.

This drove me to become a emo-like hipster poet/guitarist/song writer. I pretty much hate everyone in my school save 5 or so people because they are all uncaring, barely sentient beings who lack any sort of capacity for critical thinking or even basic math. Everyone is a stoner except me and it annoys me cause I don't like smoking (I have asthma so I stay away from it).

Finally I just recently lost my final, most supportive best friend I've known. She was a very innocent, very smart girl and she was different in the fact that she wasn't a FUCKING WHORE like the rest of my school. She was somebody who was actually raised well and could hold a great conversation. I don't have feelings for her, and nor does she for me; it was like a brother/sister type thing. But basically we were playing truth or dare via text Sunday and she told me to make my last question before she went to sleep a good one. So, I went for a shock value kinda thing and asked her if she ever masturbated or did anything dirty. NOTE: We had been talking about sex and such up to that point already so I mean it's not like it was out of the blue! But anyway she did not answer and there was an awkward silence when she should have texted back (the kind that speaks for itself) I than shot off 4-5 more texts apologizing profusely and how stupid, awkward, and idiotic I was. She has not talked to me since.

I have a few "school friends" but I barely have any real friends; she was the last and I am alone. IT'S NOT EVEN LIKE I'M A SOCIALLY AWKWARD PERSON OR ANYTHING! EVERYONE SAYS I'M FUCKING HILARIOUS IN SCHOOL AND PEOPLE LIKE ME! But just whenever people get to know me and realize I'm not all jokes and such they leave.

Everyone leaves once they get to know me.

So here I am again, depressed, lonely, and suicidal. Just another fucking day. I miss my best friend especially; she was just nice and caring to a level I had not experienced from any other human being outside my family before. I am tearing up as I write this. I wish she could she this and yet I don't; it's a strange feeling.

The poem I'm writing now? The first few lines are as follows,

"There's no such thing as friends
Just me, myself, and the words that I've penned
And when all is said and done, don't we all just die in the end?"

Hugs, I hope you get sorted soon

[oobla37]

Wow... I wrote this huh? Man I musta been fuckin depressed lol Just to let you guys know there's a light at the end of the tunnel, my best friend and I are talking again, I'm talking to a new girl with a crush on me, and my band is playing some gigs soon. Life evens out eventually

Hey man, I don't think I have ever talked to you before, but stay strong.

[Prince LunaShy]

Tired of the PM's I see 

Y'know what, I want to just vent about how being a TS sucks and how it's made me depressed...

But I'm just too tired, I can't take hating not being who I want to be anymore, I'm just tired of waking up and thinking that I've let myself down, I'm tired of having to wait...

Being transsexual is awkward and fun at first I have to admit, realizing what you really are, how you can be really happy, but then it goes downhill fast, The depression of not being that beautiful woman you want to be, the what ifs, the doubt - Am I really a transsexual? Am I just a big fucking pretender? A Liar?

...Will I be able to do it...?

The hope is always there... that one, big fucking hope that I can push through, the hope that I can work up the guts to tell friends and family, the hope that I will be who I want to be. but it is just so hard sometimes, I feel bad nearly every day, I've cried a lot and I just feel so weak...

I just don't know... I walked through so strong and I crumbled at the first steps, I just wish this was so much simpler, I wish I was just born a woman, just... a gorgeous, happy woman, I want to be able to be who I want to be.

I just can't cope sometimes, it's too much to deal with on a daily basis.

Listen girl. Stop saying that. Instead, listen to this.
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrPte1uijDw" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrPte1uijDw</a>
This show, My Little Pony, makes me happy. Always. Maybe it can make you happy too. Just remember - the first two episodes are the worst. Now, get out there, and do women shit. Like shopping. Bitches love shopping. You can't be a woman if you don't become one. Now gimme hug!
 

[Coreybush11]

This show, My Little Pony, makes me happy. Always. Maybe it can make you happy too.

ABORT THREAD

[Prince LunaShy]

This show, My Little Pony, makes me happy. Always. Maybe it can make you happy too.

ABORT THREAD

God damnit forum, I'm going to put my fist through- Us Bronies aren't bad people! That shit makes me happy!
Don'thateusbecauseofWholeGrainpleasethat'sreallynotwhatwe'relike